thoughts

Family History

I forgot about this blog. Caught myself thinking today, “I wish I had somewhere to write random blog posts”. There’s been a lot going on with pandemic and all that I could write about, but I wanted to ramble a bit about something that’s been on my mind lately, and that’s my family history.

My Japanese course finished a few weeks ago, and for my final essay I wrote about my paternal grandmother’s life. My Bachan (short for oba-chan, the Japanese term of endearment for an old woman or grandmother), who passed away in 2010, had such an interesting life. She was born in Japan, came to Canada as a teenager (alone on a ship! Her family had gone ahead of her), was put into an internment camp during the war, met my grandfather there, and moved to Toronto for the rest of her life.

My paternal grandfather (Gechan, short for oji-chan), on the other hand, was born in Canada, went back to Japan for school, and then after returning, followed a similar path.

From the trans-Pacific immigration and travel, to the vast injustices committed against Japanese-Canadians during the war, to building a new life from scratch in Toronto, my grandparents’ story is so compelling to me. But many of the details have been lost, as they’ve both passed away, as have most of my relatives in their generation.

My Japanese study has been piquing my interest even more, lately. One of the reasons I began my study was to connect with my roots. So lately, I’ve been thinking about writing an account of my grandparents’ lives, with as much detail as I can.

I’m in turns excited and discouraged about the project. Things that would be difficult:

  • It would take a lot of time, and I’m gearing up for a very busy month at work. However, as this pandemic doesn’t seem it’s going to resolve itself anytime soon, maybe it’s a good time to start.

  • As I mentioned, a lot of the knowledge has been lost. But maybe that makes it more important to preserve what’s left that we know.

  • Maybe there would be some good resources available in Japanese, but my Japanese is nowhere near good enough to be able to be reading books that aren’t really easy children’s books. Seems like a very far-off goal.

But I do think it would be a fun and enlightening and valuable (to my family, at least) project, so I’ve started collecting resources. Once I get organized, hopefully I can record interviews with various family members, and see how much of the past I can piece together.

I like to think of myself as a half-decent writer, and I’ve been itching to write something lately, but I’ve never tried my hand at writing non-fiction, nor have I even read much non-fiction. But I think like this will be a good learning experience, in many ways.

The Kishimoto family in front of their house on Clinton Street in Toronto. My grandmother’s parents are on the outsides, and my Bachan, Gechan, and five children in the middle. My dad is the one in front with the cute hat.

The Kishimoto family in front of their house on Clinton Street in Toronto. My grandmother’s parents are on the outsides, and my Bachan, Gechan, and five children in the middle. My dad is the one in front with the cute hat.

A Whole New World

Well. Where to even start.

Sam and I are doing fine. We’ve both been working from home for the last week (Sam always works from home, so not much has changed for him). We’ve cancelled all our plans and have spent a lot of time playing video games and doing puzzles. To be honest, I’m not hating having an excuse to lock up with my new fiancé (!!!) for awhile. I guess this is the real test - if we’re not sick of each other by the time this is all over, then it’s a good sign.

Work has been difficult, but I’m managing. Our company didn’t really have the infrastructure set up to support so many people working from home, but the IT team has been heroic in getting everything up and running. We’re a bit limited still, but we’ll keep chugging along and hope it doesn’t interfere with timelines too much. I feel very grateful for my team, who have been incredibly collectively supportive, and especially grateful for my little sub-team of voice designers. Couldn’t ask for a better group of people to work with!

Morale-wise it’s been a bit of a roller coaster, for me. I haven’t been too gloomy at any point, but motivation/inspiration has been a problem. It’s hard to get away from scrolling through the news and convince myself that anything really matters. But I’ve got myself set up next to a window, and sometimes the sun is shining and the squirrels are running around in the backyard, and I think we’re going to get through this alright.

To be clear, I’m not worried for myself at all. Sam and I will be fine. But anxiety is a rock that sits on my chest, for everyone who has it less easy than us. From my friends who live alone and have to isolate alone, to the ones who are still required to show up to work, to the ones who are medical professionals and I haven’t even been able to get a hold of. The stories from places like Italy and Iran are horrifying. The stories of people not taking it seriously are infuriating. I’m not going to speculate about whether we’re doing enough, or how long this is going to last, that isn’t my place. But I feel helpless to contribute. (That being said, friends, if you’re struggling, and there’s anything I can do, please let me know!!!)

However, in the midst of all the darkness, I’m reminded of this post I made seven years ago after the Boston Marathon bombing. Extreme conditions bring out the best and worst in people, and while we’re seeing the dark sides of some, I’m much more amazed by the human capacity for compassion and ingenuity. CEOs giving up salary so that they don’t have to lay off workers. Professional athletes paying salaries of employees at their venues. Online shows, concerts, classes, masterclasses, parties. Distilleries making hand sanitizer. Stores opening early for elderly and immunocompromised. Online libraries, archives, schools opening up their materials to the public. 3D printing ventilators. Countries who have it under control sending unprecedented amounts of aid to countries who don’t. And all the efforts of individual people doing the little things they can do, adding up to a entire globe’s worth of goodwill. Surely that has to count for something, right?

Be safe, and be well, and I’ll see you when this is all over.

Marla